Question

Dear Panda,

I hope you are well. I've heard that your Mom and Dad people are away so they probably had taken their laptop with them and you can't email. So typical! I'm going to ask Santa for my own mobile. You should do the same!

Something has been bothering me for a while and I thought I would run it past you...
Is your tongue as long as your legs? Mine is!!!

 

Speak soon,

xxx

Olivia

 

ps. Have they left you enough food and snacks? I just had that horrible thought that they left you with no snacks!!!!

 

 

my Peacock tail

Do you like my tail?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbbAzcWNm1s&feature=youtu.be

Weekend update!

Hello Panda,

I hope you had a nice weekend. I was terribly busy and spent a long time in the car (at least it felt that long because I was stuck at the back seat and whined a lot and, to make matters worse, they put a seatbelt on me!!! Pfft... I was really grumpy. I should be always at the front so I can see better, ideally with half of my body sticking out of the window.  They bought me that thing called "child booster seat"so really, I could see very well, but still, you should always stick to your guns. Never compromise or you will be stuck at the back seat! ( that's a metre.....meta... metaphor!)

So as usual, we went to farmer's market but this time it was in a place called Brixton, in South London. They have lots of butchers and fish places and it smelled so lovely...mmmm... Food Dispenser didn't like it that much until we got to that little Jamaican Café and we had some yummy food.

Mmm...Goat curry...I was just about to tuck in when Dad took a snapshot. He took quite few of them and I was getting to a point when I had to control my nerves... Everyone knows that patience is not my strong point.

 

will...you...just...let... me...eat!

 

 

We then walked around and I was finding the most wonderful treats on the ground and, luckily, Mom and Dad people were too busy looking for that thing called "good coffee" so I could just get on with it for once. They always tell me off and try to fish it out of my mouth. So rude.

I read your last post and I like your thinking! I can tell we will be BFF's. As Mom says, I have a good feeling about it... or maybe she says gut feeling. I'm not sure because of her funny accent... Dad always says that you should use logic and think things through before making decisions... Mom's eyes are glazing over when he says that...

Personally, I like acting on an impulse. Have you heard of 5 second rule? it doesn't work in our household because the minute food lands on the floor I am there like the wind! BOOM!!!
Sometimes I grab a bit of an onion by mistake and have to spit it out but more often,  it's some yummy carrots or chorizo...

Mom and Dad people say that world is full of nutcases. If there are cases surely there must be plenty of nuts, right?  So I guess that should make it easier for us to find that country thing to rule! I will do some more research on the internet and let you know but I am more than sure than England must be full of nuts because there are lots of squirrels in the park. Maybe you could ask Chip if that's correct?

Now, I would like to reassure you about the tail thingy... I think it's normal to have a shorter tail... My friend Meryl has got a very short tail and she can only wag her bum because there is not much tail to use...My tail is longer than hers and I sometimes forget it's there and get spooked by it and need to chase it... Actually Mom person calls it piggy tail. Is it offensive because I'm not sure? So my waggy thingy can look different depending on my mood...

 that's my tail when I'm excited ( I was waiting for my ball here)

 

 

  and that's my tail when I'm waiting for snacks and they are not coming...

 

I also can pretend to be a peacock with. You just have to wag it very fast. I will post a video of me saying hello to the Food Dispenser later.

I must say that I also have a problem with my appearance and  although I don't usually notice it at first, I tend to suffer from chills in my left ear... sometimes I will just walk around and Mom person will shout: "Olivia flip your ear back!" But I can't hear her because it's too windy!

 WHAAAT? It's too windy! I can't hear you!

And don't worry about lies people Mom and Dad say about you.. They exaggerate... like at least million times a day!

Have a good day and talk soon,

xxx

Olivia

Storm in a teacup ( that is England)

Ahoy Panda!

I was watching the news last night and they were talking about that STORM THING in England and it looked scary.

So I decided to prepare myself for the extreme weather condition this morning.

Me and my ball ready for the storm.

I look very serious here because it's not a laughing matter. My ears were flapping like mad in the wind.

Stay alert in case that storm thing comes close to you.

Peace and Peas,

xxx

Olivia

Countries That Are Shaped Like Bacon?

Dear Olivia,

YOU HAVE A KONG TOO?!?!?!  That is SWEET! I love my kong so much! I have this trick that I use with the Kong. I will share it with you as long as you pinkie swear not to tell anyone else. Once I've taken the Kong away from mom or dad, I run away with it. When I am within at least arms reach I will push my jowl into the little hole. Then I present the Kong back to mom and dad. Only this time, they can't take it because it is stuck to my mouth! It's so funny to watch them pull and pull! You should try that with Mr. or Mrs.  Food Dispenser. You will love it!

I like your idea of ruling a country. I think we should look into this further. You bring up some very valid points. I concur. What exactly is a country? I pulled out an atlas and found a place that is somewhat shaped like a piece of bacon. It is called California. The place that is called Florida also has a bacon shape. I read that the top is called the panhandle. If there is a panhandle then surely there is a pan! And inside of pans come the best food! Are California and Florida considered countries? If they aren't could we consider them? Anything bacon shaped has to be a good thing, right?
As you can see I sought the counsel of my trusted adviser, Chip. Chip used to be brown with a white and black stripe on his back. One day, he went missing and when he returned he smelled new and was a different color, and had put on weight.  His squeaker had also miraculously healed! It was a miracle! But as I was saying, I discussed this country ruling idea with Chip and he would like us to pick out a place that is full of nuts. According to mom and dad, nuts are everywhere. They seem to be found on places called highways and roads. That will be the next thing I Google. Chip will be pleased.

So anyway, I have a question for you. It's more of a concern actually. I seem to be missing something. In several of your pictures I see that you have a very nice and long wavy waggy thing. I have made a thorough inspection of my wavy waggy thing and it is much more short compared to yours. Could I have been in an accident and lost it? I've checked several times and I am convinced it differs from yours. Does yours actually curl? Mine does not. I am concerned. Is something wrong with me?

Why is it so short?

By the way, if we do this country ruling thing I should tell you that I have a long history of slander against me. My parents have been stating the following for years, "Never trust a Panda." Could this hurt my chances of ruling? Is there someone that can erase this terrible and false record?

I hope you are having a good day. By the way, you cannot suck on a cat. They do not like that. And whatever you do, never try to lick their butt. They will cut you.

That is all.

Hugs,

Panda 

Why Sealyhams should be presidents of some important country!

hi Panda,

Sorry, busy day today. I had big breakfast to finish and then I whined a lot because my dinner kong was on the table but I couldn't see it and I thought it was dinner time already. Anyway, all good now. They told me it was for later and gave me small frozen kong instead. mmm.. meat popsicles..

I had some filming going on outside our block so had to keep an eye on what they were doing. You can't trust those stuntman.

 Yours truly. In charge of filming.

 

So anyway, those fluffy things living with you, what do you call them again? Flaps? Cats? yes, so what do they do? I have something similar.. Mom human says that it's my comfort blanket and every evening I pick it up and take it to bed and suck on it.. Very relaxing.. maybe you should try it with your cats? go for the one at the back though...  The orange one looks like trouble... the one at the back looks like he wouldn't care...

 

 me with my cat.

 

What was I talking about? Oh yes, so I was thinking that we should be presidents of some important country.

I mean, I can't think of anyone better than us to be honest.... and here are my reasons:

 

1. We are happy most of the time

 Mom human calls is Chinese Wise Man face

 

2. We are natural leaders

 see? 1 step ahead of my friend..:-)

 

3. We look great in pretty much anything

I was humming "no woman, no cry". Bob Marley was my inspiration here

 

3. We know when to disappear from public eye and rethink our strategy

 

  here is me, in my safe place, looking at different options

 

4. We are masters of disguise

 Hello, I'm Groucho Marx.. just kidding, it's me, Olivia.

 

5. We offer the best high 5...ever

 

  pretty self explanatory

 

So I'm currently looking at the map of the world, trying to decide which country we should rule but that map I found looks very complicated..

 

 

hmmm... 

 

speak soon

 

luv

xxx

Boo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



It's Friday BOOM!

 

I'm Sharing My Home With...Cats!

Dear Olivia.

Thank you for the sweet compliment on my coat. I can assure you it is all smoke and mirrors. My mom
works in the professional hair industry and uses dry shampoo and leave in conditioner on me. I actually have a few dread locks of my own. Especially in my beard and under my chin. I like the rastafarian look and wish that she would just leave it alone. I hate brushings too! Ugh!

The picture of you and Food Dispenser is so beautiful! I love that you are jumping! It looks like it was a beautiful wedding! I would love to hear these accents your parents have. My mom and dad sound different as well. They are Southerners and have a bit of a twang. They speak slow and drag out words. It's endearing but sometimes it just bothers me. I caught myself saying bawk the other day instead of bark. It's a bit catchy.  If you've ever watched Hart of Dixie you will find similar accents to how my mom and dad speak.

It must be wonderful to have some dog friends. I don't have dog friends. I just have family friends. And then there are the fur beasts. I probably need to tell you that I share my home with several...cats. I have not yet figured out what they are here for or what they want. They seem to be very covert though. As if they are planning something. They are pretty useless except for when I play Panda Safari and run through the house pretending to be a rhinoceros. I like to pick them up with my nose and flip them up high into the air. It really ticks them off. I guess it's really a release for me.

Here is a picture of me and the fur beasts.

                                                                      I. Am. In. Hell.

The orange one is especially annoying. She is always yapping. She was yapping when mom took this picture. She never shuts up. The gray one steals my toys. We need to make a plan to keep our toys and treats from being taken. Maybe some courses in agility? I'm not very fast. My head is the fastest thing about me. Mom calls it my Hungry Hippo action. Apparently there was a game that had hippos lunging their mouths at marbles and I have a similar feature. Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Just don't take my stuff. Right?

I hope  you have had a good day. I will send more correspondence soon.

Best,
Panda

Silly Ham

Good morning to you fellow Sealyham! ( that  name gets me every time, silly ham hehhe).

I was going to email you last night but my people were out  and I went to see my friend, who lives upstairs. Her name is Meryl. She is a Schnauzer. She is alright but sometimes steals my ball when we are outside ( everyone knows that you do not mess up with my ball. If there is anything I love more in life than eating it would be that ball. But she is so quick! I turn around to sniff something and BOOM! the ball is gone! Meryl's Dad always helps me to get the ball back. He is nice like that.)

So anyway, things in England are not much better than in America. When FD takes me out to farmer's markets ( she is obsessed with food, just like me) and people point at me to say how cute I am (on those rare occasions my beard is clean and doesn't have leaves and food stuck in it)  they always say: "is she a Westie Cross? She is like a white Scottie" and my human tries to explain I'm a Sealyham and they go: "Silly what?" *sigh* I mean.. seriously? do I look like a barrel to you? I'm long and slim and so much cuter than those Westies! Maybe it's just her accent... She is from different country called Poland ( funny it has got land in it just like England) but my human Dad is more complicated to explain because I think he is from Korea (is it far from you?) but then lived in Argentina and Australia. They speak funny in Australia... when my people got married recently ( did I tell you I was at the wedding? OMG, I looked so cute! Look )

sorry, I got distracted.. so anyway, Human Dad's family came over from Australia and they all spoke funny. my human Mom's Mom is great. She says that I look hungry and feeds me all the time. She really gets me. Sometimes she gets busy talking ( she talks A LOT) so I have to push her with my paws to remind her of my malnourishment.

By the way, I love your coat! Where did you get it from? And your beard looks so white! My human Mom got upset because we didn't have any brushing in a long time ( I really hate being brushed and washed so I always run away from her when I know it's coming)  and when she tried to brush me it was hard. She said I looked like Bob Marley with my dirty dreadlocks ( I personally don't mind but it's a little bit itchy) and she cut it all off. I wasn't happy...

Can you see my sarcastic smile? She should never be allowed near scissors unless it's to open snack packets.

 

And I totally agree with you about humans! They should learn a lot from us. They always talk about that Work thing and Stress thing but when we play ball they laugh a lot and forget about it all. I keep telling them that the ball is what they need. We should all eat, play and snooze. Wasn't there a book with that title? I should really be famous... I come up with all those ideas...

 

Anyway, it has been a long day so I better go to bed now.

 

Speak soon my Panda friend

xx

 

luv

 

Boo

 

ps. Did you know my real name is Polrose Party on ! no joke!

Selfies Are Difficult When Your Arms Are Short

GRRRRR. This is the best that I can do.

                                                            -Panda

Dear Olivia

Hello Olivia.

My name is Panda. Or Panda Nana. Actually, when I was still a member of a litter back in Bakersfield, California my name was Yellow. All of my brothers and sisters were named after different colors so our breeder person could keep us apart. So I started out being Yellow. I am pretty sure that shortly after I was born Chris Martin, lead singer of my favorite band, Cold Play, wrote a song, wrote a song for me. And it was called Yellow. That was actually a year before I was born. But I like to think that it was meant to be. My mom person tells me that yellow means caution and that it was a perfect first name for me.

I now reside in a place that is hot as 47 hells called Cullman, Alabama. Here, people do not know of Sealyhams. When the mom person walks me people ask if I am a "Westie." It's very offensive. Even more offensive is that the mom person has grown so accustomed to hearing this question that she just smiles, nods, and walks on. She never even corrects them! Do they even look at my ears? My ears are not POINTY! RUFF! I'll bet no one ever mistakes you for a Westie there in the motherland.

I do apologize for my late response to your first communication. The mom person was away again and I did not have access to the laptop. She leaves. A lot. She's some traveling working person, a busy business woman if you may, and that is fine with me. I like having my dad all to myself. He is the best! Until I eat poop. And then he gets really loud and makes ugly faces. I probably shouldn't have said that. About the poop I mean.

I am so happy to have found you. If only we weren't so far away! But at least we can converse back and forth over this web thing. There has been a lot of uproar over here in the states lately about our government shut down. I just don't understand humans. They put people into positions of great power without ever once sniffing their butts! I mean come on! How are you really to know how trust-worthy a person is until you have sniffed their butt? If you ask me that is the problem with America. They trust the words coming out of other humans mouths when they should be trusting something entirely different! A simple sniff around the buttocks and you're done. It's like a credit report and a million personal references tied into one. Anyway, I could go on and on but I am sure you know exactly what I mean. These humans are silly.

I am leaving you with a recent picture of me in my favorite place. The spot in front of my food station. I'm actually saying "Hi" in this shot. I hope you like it. Talk to you very soon. Peace out, Dog.

Best,
Panda

happy Monday!!! yeah right...

Wake me up on Tuesday...

 

zzz...

Hello Panda

hi Panda !
So my people tell me that we are Sealyhams ( LOVE THE NAME, IT HAS GOT HAM IN IT!!!)

Me   

 

 You

 

I seriously can't see the resemblance.... can you ?

Anyway, when Food Dispenser and her Husband go to work I have time to myself and between eating snacks, snoozing (girl needs her beauty sleep, right?) and trying to figure out how to open the freezer door (I LOVE frozen peas!!) I will tell you about things I do.

She tells me that you live across the pond! I love ponds! I throw myself in it and swim but then freak out because,you know, I only have short legs and I can't touch the ground with my paws! Anyway, I have my 2 friends, Andy and Benny staying over so I better go as I need to entertain them and make sure they don't touch my snacks. Food Dispenser goes crazy and gives my snacks to dogs who visit! Can you believe it?

Crazy woman. What if we run out? My life will be literally over..

 

Speak soon!

x

Love, Olivia ( friends call me Boo).